A sign at Budapest's zoo requests:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food give it to the guard on duty.
A Polish hotel informs prospective visitors in a flyer:
As for the trout served you at the hotel monopol, you will be singing its praise to your grandchildren as you lie on your deathbed.
A Seville tailor makes clear how he will handle commissions:
Order now your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation
A sign on a clothing store in Brussels read:
Come inside and have a fit
Outside a Paris dress shop:
Dresses for street walking
In a Tokyo shop:
Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.
Outside a Hong Kong dress shop:
Ladies have fits upstairs
A dentist's doorway in Istanbul proclaims:
American dentist, 2th floor. Teeth extracted by latest Methodists.
An airline ticket office in Copenhagen reminds you:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.
In a Bangkok temple:
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.
On the box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.
Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan:
Stop: Drive Sideways
From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo:
When passengers of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he will still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.
In an Acapulco hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
Some German hospitals now display the sign:
No children allowed in the maternity wards.
In the office of a Roman medical:
Specialist in women and other diseases
Visitors in Czechoslovakia are invited by the tourist agency to:
Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages.
A Rome laundry suggests:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.
In a Bangkok dry cleaner's:
Drop your trousers here for best results
A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest reads:
It is strictly forbidden on our Black Forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.
In a Hong Kong supermarket:
For your convenience, we recommend courteous, efficient, self -service
A London eaterie advertised for help this way:
WANTED: man to wash dishes and two waitresses
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for
On the menu of a Polish hotel:
Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up n the country people's fashion
In the window of a Swedish furrier the message reads:
Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin.
A notice in a Vienna hotel urges:
In case of fire do your utmost to alarm the hall porter.
Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance:
English well talking
Here speeching American